May 17, 2009

I have needs...

(This may be a TMI post for some)

I have needs I have not been able to meet lately. Tonight I was just so frustrated I took a long how shower and just let my mind wander. When I was a kid, I was so carefree and no burdened by these reckless desires and longing for time in the bedroom.... see, I am tired. I feel like every morning I cannot start the day without a cup of coffee or two. When did I grow up? When did I start craving such adult desires. Yet I am teased by exhaustion, and itch I cannot scratch... because I am one of those who cannot nap! I know, crazy huh? I can have all my kids at school, the baby can be taking a three hour nap and I just lay there, unsatisfied. And right now, it is 12:45am, I know I have to be up in a few hours, but I just cannot settle my mind and instead I am having a quickie in bed, with my MacBook and my blog. I know if I do not get this off my chest I will lay in bed all night and not be able to drift off to dreamland.

I was looking at some pictures today of many years back... the innocent years, when I could get up easily in the morning and spend all day running around outside. Coming home only when the street lights came on. If I was thirsty, I drank from the hose. If I was hungry, I went inside my house, or that of a friend's and got a snack. Now, I can barely drag my 4 year old upstairs without feeling my muscles tighten in my back. I looked in the mirror today and realized it is time to dye my hair... not red, blue or pink like when I was a teen, but the same color it is now.. just to hide the gray hairs that keep appearing no matter how fast I pluck them out.

On SwingI watch my children growing up so fast and I want to yell "slow down, enjoy this, stop being in such a hurry to grow up", but they don't get it. I sure didn't. I never understood the adage "Youth is wasted on the young" until I was no longer young and longed for those times back.

Maybe some day soon I will be able to lay down in bed at 9pm and close my eyes and drift right off to sleep. I will sleep soundly, for 9 or 10 hours. I won't lay wide awake in bed thinking about everything I need to do in the morning. About an appointment next week that makes me anxious, or a promise that was broken and how much it hurt our feelings, or inconvenienced an already busy week. I will wake up easily, naturally. No need for coffee, no need to feel like I need to shake off the sleep from sleeping too long. Bright eyed and bushy tailed. No kids to carry upstairs at midnight. No babies crying at 1am. No need to wake up and investigate every little creek and groan. And if it is noon, and I have eaten my lunch and I feel sleepy, I want to be able to lay down on my mat with my favorite toy and a blankie and be able to sleep for an hour or two without disturbance.

So yes, I have adult needs. I need to get a good nights sleep. I need a great hairdresser who can do magic with grays. I need a chiropractor and a massage for my aching back. And I need a babysitter, so *I* can be the one playing outside all day long, with no cares in the world... until the street lights come on.

Battle of the sexes

I was talking with a friend who was telling me a cute story about how her son identifies adult and children males and females and it got me wondering what Matthew calls them as I have only noticed him say "boy & girl".

So I picked up a magazine and I asked him "What is that?" and he says "girl" and I said "but she is a grownup, so what is she" and he says "she is a woman!" so then I found a picture of an adult male and asked him what that was and he thought a moment and said "he's a dude!!"

What is even funnier about the answer is that from the time he could talk, Matthew has been calling our friend across the street "The Man", no matter how many times we corrected him or told him his name, he was always still just "The Man".


Austin found a pit bull puppy today and put it in our back yard with a bowl of water. It was salivating so much from being thirsty that Christopher said "Oh no! It has rabies! It is foaming at the mouth!" The pup was nice enough, but I sure was glad that the humane society was quick in picking it up.


Sophie has been a pill for the last two days. Nothing seems to make her happy and she is not wanting to eat or nap. I think we may be seeing some new teeth soon. On a positive note, I was able to get all her 6-9 month clothing washed and sorted and put away with any of her 3-6 month summer clothes that still fit. She was screaming at my feet almost the entire time, but at least I managed to get it done. Thankfully it looks like she should have enough clothes to make it through the summer, especially if the ones I have soaking in oxyclean come clean. I may take a trip to the new Goodwill soon, because I am sure everyone could use some new summer clothes.

May 14, 2009

Distraction, routine, and other little updates.

It is Thursday already?? I think after all the disappointment of last weekend, this weekend is trying to get here at light speed to make me like them again. Well my mother's day was nice, but holy heck Saturday was a mess.

So we had another laundry fiasco a few weeks back... the kids again were not helping, so I quit once and for all. Bought myself 3 new baskets (reds/pinks, whites, and darks), gave them the old ones to do the same, and decided they are big boys, they can use my washer & dryer on Fri, Sat, & Sun, and I will use it Mon-Thu. That was a few weeks ago and it has taken some time getting into the routine, but they seem to be catching on. Well Monday I get my W&D back and I am relived to finally have a chance to clean Matthew's laundry from his bout with the stomach flu, but the dryer is taking longer than normal and the clothes are cold. I knew it was likely my heating element and started calling to get someone out.

The first company I called said they could be out on Wednesday... unsatisfactory, so I called another and they said they would be out that same day. Thankfully Matthew was home trying to work out the bug still, so when it was time to pick up Austin I just *knew* he would arrive as I was trying to leave, and sure enough he did. So I let Austin do what he has been begging to do for 2 years... walk home. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, can we say lesson learned?? He NEVER wants to do that again.

Anyways, 30 minutes and $260 later I had a working dryer and I have been trying to catch up ever sense. Monday I lost most of the day, Tuesday the cat decided he would use my clean clothes as a litter box, so those clothes needed reloaded, and I also used that time to go to the store to get more kitty litter and rearrange chores so the cat boxes would now be cleaned by the other child, and the other child would do his chores. I also found a smoking deal on a cat climbing post/house that I seem to appreciate more than my ungrateful fur-butts. So what I am saying is that about 287,403,028 1/2 loads later I am *almost* done with laundry for three whole days!!

Speaking of laundry, this is the hired help... does that explain why it takes me so long to finish??

Sophie's pediatrician's office called back, all Sopher's blood tests were normal... we will go back in July and see how much, if any, weight she has gained. Another reason that I am up to my eyeballs in laundry is that I decided it was time to put Sophie in 6-9 month clothes. That baby has almost worn out all her 3-6 month clothing... I did not know babies were ever IN their clothes long enough to wear them out. Unfortunately, most of her new clothes are winter clothes... so I am going to have to box them back up and then reevaluate how much we will need to go buy for the summer. We have a new Goodwill in town I have been wanting and excuse to check out.

May 12, 2009

Matthew and the books

Matthew is starting to read. JUST starting. I took him to Barnes and Noble today so we can get some Bob books, they are like our generation of our parents Dick and Jane books (they still sell those by the way!). While I was there I also got him some Biscuit books, which are a little harder, but my older boys loved them. The entire time there I am talking to Matthew about what a big boy he is and that he is ready to start trying to read. We bought the books, he carried his little bag of books out to the curb and when I asked him to hold hands he tells me "I am a big boy now mama, I am going to be reading soon, so I am too big to hold hands".

Silly boy.

May 8, 2009

Holy crap!! I have a teenager!!

Austin is thirteen today, THIRTEEN, 1-3. Holy cow how did that happen?!? Normally one would lament on the day their baby was born, but I feel truly blessed that I have SO much more I can lament on. I can remember the day like it was yesterday when I met him the first time. He was 2 1/2, in a red shirt and blue jean overalls. He was so tiny, but I got a glimpse of what Christopher would look like in another 18 months. I also remember one year later, the day he came home, I remember him smoothing out his quilt on his bed my sister made for him. He kept asking over and over if that was really his own bed.

The years flew by with so many unforgettable memories. Him calling me mom for the first time. Him wrapping his arms around me and telling me he loves me. First day of Kindergarten, losing his first tooth, riding his first airplane, riding on the back of my dad's Harley and then telling me he did not even hold on half the time. His personality started coming out more and more and I adored the little person he was turning into. He is compassionate, caring, funny, smart, but at the same time so blond. I just cannot believe what a change he has made with his life... he was once such a mouthy, angry child. I remember him telling Christopher how much he hated him and getting into fights at school. I remember him hitting me in the face and acting out so terribly that we were concerned about his mental health.

Then he blossomed. Slowly, beautifully, like a flower in the morning dew. He let the sunshine into his heart and it spread! His joy and happiness was contagious, everyone he met loved him. His teachers raved about how much compassion he had for his friends. Last year, the school acknowledged all his marvelous traits when they recognized him for the great kid he is when he made student of the year. I cried, oh how I cried. I cried because he did not start out this way and build to this great kid. He worked hard, twice as hard to get to this place. He started out at a -100 and worked his butt off to be a +100. He overcame so much to get where he is now.

He is such a funny little boy. This morning he went back to school after missing 3 days of school this week due to illness. When we pulled up he said "ohhh, this place looks familiar, but I can't place it... I think I was here a LONG time ago". Funny, funny boy!

May 7, 2009

Update on Sophia

I took Sophie to the lab at the hospital today for her blood draw. That place is a maze, I spent more time lost then we did in the lab. Twice we needed volunteers to take me where I needed to be when we were lost, and I am talking down long hallways and up elevators... and after we navigated the maze and got to the right lab and the right valet, we did not even get any cheese!

Sophie did well. They were able to get the blood they needed from her bruised little arms, without drawing it from her head. I won't know the results until next week, but I am hopeful we will get good results.

May 5, 2009

Sophia: My great big wonder woman in a teeny tiny body


Sophie had a well baby appointment today, I had asked at a ped appointment a few weeks back at my concern over her slow growth. She told me to make a well baby visit ASAP and we would discuss it.

So today she saw her ped who said she was 24 1/2 inches long, and 12 pounds, 9.5 ounces. She is 3% under the growth chart in all areas, and taking her last few measurements into consideration is right on track for that of a 4 month old... at 11 months. My ped said she is not too worried yet, but wanted to run some blood tests and see her back in 2 months after I make some minor dietary changes (more fatty foods, more yogurt, etc). She is not behind on any of her milestones, and actually was ahead on some (crawling, 2 word sentences), she also nurses well and sleeps well.

We arrive at the lab and they are pretty empty, but still fairly slow. The phlebotomist suggested I nurse her in a private room to calm her down as she was already fussing, and to make sure she was well hydrated. Two of the four lab tests required a lot of blood (thyroid & celiac disease test) and the CBC & lead test required very little, so they were glad she had easy to find, thick, veins. They wrapped her up in a thick blanket and had me hold her super tight while one woman held her arm, and another woman drew blood. They used a syringe, a tube and a butterfly needle and almost immediately her vein burst. So they wrapped her again and tried the other arm and again her vein broke.

SuniThey barely had enough for the first two tests, so they recommended I wait two days and then take her to the hospital to have her blood drawn from her head by a pediatric nurse. My poor baby!

She was so brave. She eventually just turned red, while tears ran down her face, without crying. My heart just broke for her. After the ordeal she held me so tight and just laid in my arms.

May 3, 2009

Quiet couple of days.

We started with the landscaping project on Thursday. Changes are slow, but exciting. I have been posting pictures on my facebook, but not my Flickr and I will post before, during & after pictures here once the work is done.

First of all, the NFH's have still been quiet. The SUV that took all but one of them away last week, returned today, so we will see if the peace lasts.

Also, the Great Dane behind me has been quiet too, it has been wonderful.

We are replacing our back fence, which is right next to the fence of the neighbors behind me. When mine came down, we realized that our two crappy fences were being held together by the gravity of each other, and her Ivy vines. So after they propped their fence up, I decided it was time to pay them a visit to offer to share a fence if they paid the couple hundred dollars to remove their fence by my guys. They agreed that our plan would benefit us both mutually, and it looks like at least the portion we share will be going down Monday.

They are such sweet people. A retired couple and he plays in the band. They explained to me that the Great Dane was driving them nuts too, and they talked to the owners and lent them a bark collar that ran out of batteries some time that second night. On the third night, the new family was moved in enough to stay at the house and bring the dog in. I have not heard a peep from him since, so I am pretty sure he was just lonely.

Days like the last few make me really like my neighborhood. :)